This Morning

I'll always need her.

I can't take this. It's killing me. Why do I need her so much? It's so.. fucking.. DIFFERENT!! I've never wanted someone this badly. Never needed someone in my life so much. All I can think about is her. All I dream about is her. Everything relates back to her in some way. Even when I have troubles at home. In the moment I think.. 'Hannah would punch her lights out right now if she could.' and it gets to me. I love her. I am in love with her. This feeling. Love. What is it? What does it mean? Why is it so strong? I want to give her every little piece of me on a silver platter, just fall to my knees in front of her and just go, 'Here you go. It's all there. Every little pathetic piece of me.' and you know what?? She's smile and say 'Thank you.' I know she would. And I would be more than satisfied. I'm wrapped so tight around her finger, I'm just hoping her circulation is still going well... I love her. GOD, DO I LOVE HER! EVERYTHING ABOUT HER!! From the little giggles and dumb jokes, to the stubborn 'no to everything' attitude. I love it all. It's safe to say I'm addicted. But she's better than drugs because she's actually good for me. She's amazing. She cares. She actually WANTS me in her life. And I continually sound cheesy in front of her and when I'm just writing about her. Like right now. I'm writing my heart out like there's no tomorrow for her because I STILL can't seem to get her off of my mind for a single second. EVERYTHING ABOUT HER IS SEEPED WITHIN MY SKULL! SET INTO MY BONES! AND SWIMMING IN MY BLOOD! She is a part of me now. And I want to scream it to the world because it feels so good. It feels... AH! AMAZING! I can't believe I've found her. I really can't. I had no idea she even existed. I thought she was just a dream. Everything I was setting my life on. I needed her forever and always, and now I have her. What is that?!?!?! SHE'S REAL?!?!?! I scream. It's so... unbelieveable. But I love it. She's everything. Everything I need. Everything I want. I'll go to the ends of the world for her and back. No matter what I need her in my life forever. And I won't let anyone steal her from me. If she wants to leave, she will. But I really don't think she does, and I love that more. She actually loves me. Me. The un-needed. Unlovable. Unwanted. Piece. Of. Shit. Me. HOLY FUCK!! She loves me!! How she does? I have no idea, but I am SOOO happy she does. It sets my soul alight. And keeps my breathing throughout the night. No matter what happens. What I go through. Who I meet. Or how things end up. I will ALWAYS love her. No matter what. Hannah Princess Avery. I. I'm in love with you.